Emily, Zoe, and AndyThere is a theme weaving through what I’m reading and praying and learning about.  It’s finding meaning during suffering.
It’s very strange.  So much of my belief over the past 10 years has centered around the fact that God doesn’t cause bad things to happen….everything has been perfect so it was easy to believe that….and than WHAMO…a really bad thing happened, it smacked me in the face and made me realize that life is not a fairy tale.  I can’t help but ask why?  What did i do to deserve this?

Through the book “Man’s Search for Meaning” and the latest sermon series at my church called “Grounded”, I’ve learned that despite God’s GOOD plans for us…bad things happens.  It’s how you deal with the bad that matters.

“Pain is inevitable, but misery is optional”
For example, weight lifting.  When you lift weights you’re getting stronger even though your muscles feel weaker.  After the 3rd set your muscles feel like limp noodles hardly able to lift a pencil, but you know that it’s only temporary.  You do it purposely to get stronger.  Literally as your muscles rip and tear they rebuild themselves stronger.
My brokeness and suffering is producing perserverence and hope.  Someday I will be able to write all about this.  Right now I must be vague.
I’ve never experienced such suffering before.  I thought I had, but I never have been through anything like this.  Suffering will change you.  If you allow it to.  If I allow hope to seep in during this time of suffering and not dwell on the negative, the reasons why I should give up, if I persevere, I wil be better.  My heart muscles are repairing themselves stronger than they were before.
There is hope that lies beyond our suffering. I will not be caught by bitterness and misery, but hang on to the glory that will be revealed in us.  Something so much better awaits…