So, there is a “For Sale” sign in my yard.   Here’s the story: 

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 In April, I was inspired to pray for God to “move me”.  I was listening to a sermon based on Peter walking on water…you know the one, when God had to “goad” him out of the boat. 

At that time in my life I was working full time and not balancing being a mom, a DJ, a wife, and a friend very well.  I had seemingly a great arrangement.  I was able to work 3 hours at home and 5 in the office.  So, my morning was with Emily and my afternoon was with KSBJ listeners.  But, I had too much work.  On top of my show, I was also the project manager for a new website design, and the webmaster for the current website.  Even when I was home, I was always working.  I was constantly exhausted and angry.  So, I asked God to “move me”.  I remember praying, “God, I’m ready.  I know you know what is best for me…what will bring my family the most joy and what will make the greatest impact on your kingdom.  Lord, if it’s time for me to move from KSBJ, than I think you’re going to have to “move me”.  I’m sorry I’m stubborn.  I’m a lot like Peter.  Goad me out of the boat if that’s what you want me to do.  Lord I’m ready for the next step of ministry.  I feel I have accomplished much in 7 years at KSBJ, what is that you want for my next 7?”

The next day at work, I was told my “arrangement” was no longer possible.  They had decided to limit the work from home part time deal to a year.  I had 2 more months before all 8 hours were in the office.  I know I sound like a wimp.  Hey, I’m okay with that.  I know what I can handle, and that I couldn’t.  When you’re on the air from 4p-7p every week night you miss dinner, bathtime, and bedtime with your child.  I’d get home at my daughter was asleep.  And 8 hours, was always more like 10 because of my workload.  So, I made the tough decision to stop working full time after my 2 months was up.  It actually wasn’t that hard of a decision because after that prayer I knew it was God doing what I asked.  “Moving Me”.  He had already set it in motion before I even finished my prayer!  He was just waiting for me to be willing.  That’s all it takes, a willing heart. 

Here’s what the angel Gabriel said to Daniel after one of those cry out to God prayers:

 “Daniel, I have come to make things plain to you. You had no sooner started your prayer when the answer was given. And now I’m here to deliver the answer to you. You are much loved! So listen carefully to the answer, the plain meaning of what is revealed…”  Daniel 9:22-23

Kind of freaky isn’t it!  After I went through the long goodbye on the air, I began praying for an open door.  God closed one, so I was requesting an open one!  I was dreaming with God about making myself available to speak at churches to women about Depression, finding an agent to help me publish my book, and eventually starting an organization that would help women break the cycle of Depression by building a lodge in Jackson Hole, Wyoming that would be a retreat for women that needed it.  We’d go hiking, mountain climbing, and reconnect with God in the midst of one of his most beautiful creations.  I had my own ideas, but God had another.  The open door wasn’t exactly for me.  It was for my husband. 

God promises He is our provider.  While we were taking this huge leap forgoing my salary so I could become a full-time mom, God was working behind the scenes to make up for that lost income.  This month, we found out that my husband’s company is transferring us to Fairfax, Virginia.  It’s just outside of Washington D.C.  It’s more than a transfer, it’s an exciting opportunity for my husband’s career, and the help that the company is giving us to move is making up for my salary.  So, God answered my prayer, “Move Me”.  It wasn’t the way that I thought it was going to be, but it’s even better.  God’s dreams are always bigger and better than ours for…I’m learning. 

I wish I could tell you that I took the news like it was an answered prayer and jumped for joy, praising God.  It wasn’t like that.  I cried.  Did nothing for 3 days and finally surfaced to start spreading the news.  Telling my mom was the hardest.  It broke my heart, they bought a part-time residence to be closer to their grandchild, our daughter.  And now we were leaving.  They knew this was a possibility, but we all kind of dismissed the chances of it.  HA!  I remember the week before the “news of moving” my mom and I were hanging out at her place playing with Emily at a Sand Table, thinking…”how great is our life!” 

Life is great.  Even with unexpected change.  My family is embracing the opportunity with us, my friends are incredibly supportive, and I know that in 2 years we will be transferred back to Houston. 

This will be good for us.  (That’s what I keep reminding myself over and over when I start to get down).  This is obviously God’s plan and dreams for my family.  I keep thinking, “be willing Amanda…be willing…that’s all God needs.”  I think that as I start to get resentful at my daily tasks of laundry, diaper duty, picking up dog poop out of the backyard, and scouring the home so it’s gleaming anytime someone wants to see it.  No one has yet.  It’s still early. 

I’m almost to afraid to petition God for the next step!  Isn’t that ridiculous?  I feel like the past 7 years we’ve been on that incline of the roller coaster, that goes TICK TICK TICK TICK TICK, and this summer we finally made it to the top and ready to go DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWN that big hill. 

The question is will I hang on to the handle bar for dear life clinging to what I think is safe screaming, or will I put both arms way up in the air cheering for the fun of the plunge. 

Every day, I’m trying to pry my sweaty fingers off that handle bar and let gooooooo!!!! 

Here’s a quote, which was the last thing I said on the air, during my last show for KSBJ.  It has even deeper meaning now! 

I will embrace the life you have laid out for me Lord, and I will live it joyfully so others might see how truly great you are.”  -Author Deann Gist

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